Party Of One

January has arrived and it's always used as a new beginning or a chance for change. Veganuary, Dry January, and joining the gym are the big three in terms of changing your life, but why?

I became veggie again in June last year because it finally clicked why I shouldn't be eating meat, and I've even stopped enjoying poached eggs and never liked milk anyway. Now, I'm trying my hardest to stop drinking all together because I honestly hate the fact I turn to it when I'm feeling anxious.

The meat industry is really gluttonous, cheeseburger adverts are made to show beef in an almost sexual light, not to mention the various deals such as "GO BIG FOR 50P EXTRA", "DOUBLE UP FOR ONLY £1", it's hard to say no when you feel like you're saving money, and that whole attitude of eating more just became incredibly off putting. Drinking isn't any different, and as I've gotten older my reaction to it has made the con list a lot longer than the pro. Hangovers, stupid decisions, and most of all, it makes my mental health something else.

My hangovers aren't terrible, but every single time I drink I lose about 2 hours and that is terrifying. The next day I could almost have a heart attack trying to piece together my night, it actually reduces me to the point of tears, and makes me not want to see a single person who could remind me of the awful stuff I did the night before.

Suffering from anxiety most of my adult life, I've always turned to drinking when I've felt a bit nervous and considering that is all the time lately, I've decided that I'd rather just not. If I feel nervous in a situation I should try and work on why I'm nervous, not just stick a G&T into the equation then wake up the next day feeling worse. I've stopped doing drugs as the comedown does the same thing, so why not do the same with booze?

Eventually I'll probably have a glass of red every now and again, but the sesh is dead and it's not okay to drink a whole bottle by yourself on a Tuesday night.

Bearcavingamy.